"What day is it? And in what month? This clock never seemed so alive. I can't keep up and I can't back down. I've been losing so much time..."

I'm stressed out again. Over the dumbest things too. I don't know what happened; I was so laid back the last couple months. And now, I'm like, Miss. Grumpy Pants.

One thing bringing me down: This summer. I should be really excited, it's summer after all, but looking past that fact makes me want to cry. See, it's the last summer of my normal life. This is the last summer all my friends will be around before they all leave and go away to new places, for new things...to new friends. But then I think "well we should just make this a really kick ass summer...road trips, late nights, beaches, long days, lots of laughs and the like"...but I have plans to go away. By myself. If I was going away with at least two of my friends (kat and brandon) who are leaving, I would be okay. But I'm not. So...I don't want to plan to go to Europe for the summer anymore because this is a summer I can never can back. It's not like I can say "Oh we'll do it next summer" because we can't. This is it.

See my problem?

And another thing bugging me: I'm into shit music now! I mean, I haven't put metallica or greenday or fodsmack or any of those good bands on my playlist in days. You know what song I'm listening to right now, as I type this (I'm mouthing the words too!) "You and me" by lifehouse. LIFEHOUSE! Like c'mon Sonya wise up here.

Ugh.

I'm off to school...right where I want to be.